We are now entering day 16 of the Russian invasion of Ukraine, and as innocent Ukrainians are killed by the misled youths of Putin’s military, the internet has been very outspoken in their support for Ukraine. The result of decades of a cold war between the two greatest superpowers on Earth has now evolved into a hot war between Russia and their less powerful neighbour, and the question on everyones’ minds is – Is Zelenskyy hot or not?
Users took to Twitter to voice their support for Ukraine, by telling the global community how sexy their leader is. The people of the internet were quick to let everybody know how much they support Ukraine and their hot president.
In recent years, the political sphere has been increasingly dominated by younger politicians, which obviously means they’re going to be sexier than the out-of-touch saggy old men we’re accustomed to seeing leading our countries. Back in 2015, Buzzfeed was ahead of the curve with their publishing of “Which Of These World Leaders Gives You The Most Thirst?”, with the top three being Trudeau, Obama, and Putin. We’re willing to bet our lives here that Zelenskyy has knocked Putin out of the ballpark at this point, perhaps increasing hostilities on Putin’s end.
When asked, Trudeau told us he was “pretty upset” that he is no longer the number one sexiest world leader, but is also happy to relinquish the title in a show of solidarity with Ukraine. Good on you Trudeau, you’re not getting any younger anyway.
Hotter than Trudeau! Ukrainian president’s defiant heroics and combat gear photos defending Kyiv turn him into an unlikely sex symbol
– Daily Mail headline, 27 February 2022
Zelenskyy pleaded to the parliament of the UK to help his country, and his pleas did not fall on deaf ears. They all stood and clapped as his handsome yet rugged face made a heartfelt speech on their screens.
They unanimously pledged to stand by Ukraine as long as he doesn’t age badly or stop being so gorgeous. The West will continue to sell weapons to his country and make record profits through gas and defense companies as long as he continues being “a good-looking bloke”, in the words of British PM Boris Johnson.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the Atlantic, the US senate gave a standing ovation during Biden’s state of the Union, where he passionately spoke about the need to defend democracy and freedom, while condemning Russia for war crimes by invading a sovereign nation. It’s nice to see the senate so united for once. They love clapping to support a beautiful white man. When they were hunting down ugly looking non-white people like Hussein, Gaddafi, and Osama Bin Laden, invading their countries and committing countless war crimes, it was to protect freedom and democracy. When Russia does it to the people led by the attractive, white Zelenskyy – well obviously that is bad and we must all clap.
The entire situation in the region is unprecedented and terrifying to say the least. Nobody can say with certainty what will happen next. Will Putin or the ‘West’ use nuclear or biological weapons? Will Russia cease their incursion into Ukraine and bombing of innocent civilians? Nobody knows. One thing we can say for sure however is – Zelenskyy is hot, and we will all have to accept that reality from now on.
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